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Con Air Simon West
Con Air Cameron Poe (Nicholas Cage) is stuck under a truck with an old man (Dabbs Greer) with a Southern drawl waiting out a gunfight. The man is wearing a trucker's hat and overalls if I remember correctly. Poe, with his long hair, tank top, and handgun, is a scary sight. The man begs Poe not to kill him. Poe isn't the bad guy though. "I'm not going to kill you old timuh," he reassures the bystander.

It's getting later in the movie and I've already endured a lot of this kind of scene. Nicholas Cage hangs onto that "you" too long even for whatever accent he's been mangling for the past 60 minutes. At this point I burst out laughing and all my pain goes away. I see that last hour in a new light. Con Air is not a terrible Hollywood action film, it's a hilarious action film spoof. Why else would Dave Chappelle be in the movie? After that revelation I spent the next 60 minutes laughing raucously as villains Cyrus 'The Virus' Grissom (John Malkovich), Diamond Dog (Ving Rhames), serial rapist Johnny 'Johnny-23' Baca (Danny Trejo), Swamp Thing (M.C. Gainey), serial killer Garland 'The Marietta Mangler' Greene (Steve Buscemi), Billy Bedlam (Nick Chinlund) and drug lord Francisco Cindino (Jesse Borrego), and guards Sally Bishop (Rachel Ticotin) and Falzon (Steve Eastin) and good guy con Baby-O (Mykelti Williamson) get ready to crash land on the Vegas strip (really!) with U.S. Marshal Vince Larkin (John Cusak) and Duncan Malloy (Colm Meaney) right behind.

There are bad action movies that you love because they are so bad (Independence Day), and those that you hate because they are so bad (Armageddon). Con Air is worse than those, but it can be enjoyed without any irony if you just realize it was meant to be pure comic gold.
115 minutes
This product was released around June 1997
I consumed this around August 2011
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Posted by: Jeff Egnaczyk at: 2/20/2012 9:18:07 AM

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