boonville blog, by jeff egnaczyk - you are listening to me talk

RIP, Andrew Bacevich
This is just awful news. A good friend of mine, Andy Bacevich, was killed by a suicide bomber at a checkpoint in Iraq on Sunday morning. I met Andy at Boston University playing basketball in Sargent Gym my freshman year. He was one of my basketball friends - friends who I only see while playing ball, too stupid and shy to ask them to go have a drink - for a while. Then we met outside through a mutual friend. I am so privileged to have become good friends with him. I found out that that friend was looking for my phone number today. There was no reason for him to be calling me as we hadn't talked in years. Our only connection was Andy. I hoped it wasn't about him. Tragically it was.

It would be pretty cliche to say that "Andy was a good man" but god dammit, Andy was a good man. He was in ROTC till they found out about his asthma. Later, after he graduated, regulations were relaxed and he gave up a job in the Statehouse to join. I was never completely sure why. He wasn't a "rah rah" guy but I could tell he had a sense of duty about it. Possibly he wanted to follow in his father's footsteps. I never really got it out of him.

He was a smart and honorable man. What I remember most about him was that he was always an independent thinker. He was my "conservative" friend in college even though you could never put him in a bucket like that. One of the best political conversations I ever had was with Andy. I posted it - "Drunken Conversation" - on this blog.

He ran marathons (we never saw him pass by though), played ball (he turned into such a dirty player in later years) and drank till he was stupid at times. He was loud. I don't know who gave him the name but at some point he was known as "The Mouth". I remember playing touch football with him and several rugby players wanted to kill him as he ran around calling himself "ultraback". When you went out with him there was always a tinge of worry in your mind. Was he going to embarrass you with his antics tonight? Drunken push-ups on the street? Striking out horribly with women at a bar (I really think it was an act, no one could be as awful as he was)? He teetered between loud, obnoxious and hilarious but it was always in good fun. He was never out to disrespect anyone, just have a good time. If you lived on Bay State Road at BU between 1999 and 2001 he was the guy with the bright neon blue light. He always tipped a lot at bars since he had worked at Crossroads (where he got me and his friends in underage on Wednesdays when you'd get a free pizza with the purchase of a pitcher) and the BU Pub. And damn he stood up straight. One time I saw him at a party and my friend was freaked out by him because he thought Andy was an undercover cop. He just had this manner about him.

Carol and I invited him to our wedding but he was off in basic training at the time (he bought a pot that we use quite often, woot). I'd see him every several months after that as he had time off. I last saw him a couple of months ago when he was home on leave. I pumped him for information about what life was like over there. I had planned to do that for years. It's not that this is unbelievable. He was in a dangerous place. It's just that it's so unexpected. And god damnit it's sad to see him go. I am weeping thinking about his life cut short. I will miss you, Andy. Rest in peace.







Update: (5/16/2007 1:54:14 PM) It's so weird reading articles about your friend in the Boston Globe, the New York Times and blogs you read. Andy's dad was a conservative critic of the war so I guess that warrants obits and tie-ins to his position on Iraq. I never met Andy's dad. I did see him in a debate at BU prior to the war. Two things struck me about him from a distance. One, he seemed like a very principled and honest man. Two, Jesus H. Christ they looked alike.

Andy's death doesn't change any position I had on Iraq. It would be pretty shallow of me to all the sudden have a "mugged by reality" moment when someone I know was died after thousands or Americans and Iraqis have already been harmed. I cringe at people using my friend's death to make a political statement, not because they shouldn't have the right or it's not an important point but because, well, he's my friend and I just do. The only point I can see as relevant is that a man opposed to the war is not a traitor to his country as some would tell you. Clearly Andrew Sr. is not. But if you didn't already know that then it's a pointless endeavor. My heart goes out to Andy's family. Though I never met them, any group of people that helped raise Andy are good in my book. The most touching thing I've read about Andy was a piece on WBUR from his sisters. It's beautiful.

Random stupid coincidence with respect to this (because I'm not superstitious to the point of almost being anti-superstition): the word of the day on Sunday was doughty , "Marked by fearless resolution; valiant; brave." I actually doubt any soldier over there is fearless. But valiant and brave? I'm sure that fits Andy well.

And I just had a funny memory of him. I was on the Boardwalk at the Jersey shore when Andy was in basic training. I saw some postcards of muscular men in speedos and immediately bought one to send to Andy. He later told me when he got it everyone thought he was gay (hey, it's the military). I was going to do it again when he went to Iraq but he cleverly got out of giving me his postal information.

Update: (5/16/2007 8:09:07 PM) Another thought, last time I saw Andy he had just bought an iPod to take back to Iraq. He wanted some songs to put on it. I just got a new laptop and hadn't copied any songs onto it. That left only Carol with her iTunes library. If you know Carol you know where I'm going with this. 'N Sync, Britney Spears, etc. We laughed, jokingly asked Andy if he wanted it. Of course he said yes. I have no doubt that he had no problem listening to poppiest of soft pop music over there. What a nut.

Also, he worked for Romney, some state senator and Strom Thurmond. It's so weird that he worked for Strom Thurmond. He was a conservative guy but to think he was like Thurmond would be to totally misread him. Some articles have mentioned that people thought he would go into politics. I can assure you that would be a disastrous career move for Andy. I think of all the stories, pictures and other physical evidence that would ruin a run for office and I cringe.